Let Your Children Know It's Not Their Fault

Divorce is not easy for anyone, especially young children. It is important that both parents let their children know that the divorce is not their fault. Be sure to tell your children that nothing they did or said made mommy and daddy fight and not love each other or caused one parent to move out of the house.

Divorce can turn a kid's world upside down. This is a scary time for young children and they will naturally wonder what is going to happen to them. Here's what they need now: Are they safe, will they have to move, will both parents suddenly leave them and stop loving them? You must reassure your children that even though there will be changes to their routine and they will no longer be living with both mommy and daddy, both parents still love them very much and that will never change. Ever.

Try to put a positive spin on the situation. Depending upon your children's ages and their level of understanding, explain to your children that it is better for mommy and daddy not to be married anymore. Stress that things will work out and that everyone will be fine. A divorced family does not have to be a broken family. Both parents should work hard at creating healthy relationships within the family unit. Also, work with your ex-spouse in a spirit of cooperation so that you can both be the best parents possible. Let your children know how much you care about them and love them. Never use the children as a "sword" against your ex-spouse. That is harmful to everyone and can only result in a "lose-lose" outcome.

Remember, when you talk to your children about divorce, don't forget to view things from "the little chair."